Dani.

Jan. 10, 2014

I am screaming. I have never felt a pain like this in my entire life. I don’t want this be true. This cant be true. I feel everything.

Jan. 10, 2014

There are some things in this life I will never completely understand.

Jan. 12, 2014

And just like that, I’m so fucking upset and hurt. My heart is in a thousand pieces for multiple reasons.

Jan. 12, 2014

I’m still in love with you. I hope you know that

Jan. 13, 2014

I can barely sleep. I wish you would come to me in my dreams. Maybe it would help and make this hurt a little less.

Jan. 13, 2014

This has done me in. I was getting better and doing so well and now I’m right back at rock bottom.

Jan. 14, 2014

How dare people get upset with me because I need time to grieve.

Jan. 14, 2014

I just need to make myself a cup of tea, light a lavender incense and lie down.

 Jan. 14, 2014
And now they’re going to cremate you and I can’t even have that closure
Jan. 15, 2014
Thinking of you
Jan. 15, 2014
I talked to your mom today. And this all just really hurts so bad still
Jan. 20, 2014

I dreamt for the first time in two weeks last night. I was screaming at people and I don’t even know who they were. There were other parts too but I don’t want to talk about them.

No matter how much sleep I seem to get I’m always tired. It’s a struggle to get out of bed every morning even with three alarms. At night I feel out of it and I started to do that “falling” thing again. I start falling asleep and feel like I stop breathing. I wake up after shaking.

Insomnia and depression I swear are best friends; my worst enemies.

 Feb. 26, 2014
I really wish you were here so I could talk to you because I know you’d understand how I’m feeling. It feels like day one of losing you all over again. I fucking hate this.
Mar. 9, 2014
Two months ago tonight you laid down to go to sleep and the next day you never woke up. My heart is breaking all over again and whoever the fuck said it gets better really doesn’t know shit.
“Time does not heal all wounds”
Mar. 10, 2014
It makes me so sad to know the last time I saw you we kissed and promised to make things alright again. I won’t ever have that opportunity. It’s been two months now and I’m happy your soul is free from this earth and it’s hardships but I miss you so much. I wish I could just wrap my arms around you and tell you that things would get better and that you can get better. Fuck this is a hard day. I’ll just see you in my dreams babe. Love you Danielle
Mar. 10, 2014
Even with tired eyes, I still can’t seem to get enough sleep anymore.
Mar. 14, 2014
And I miss you again because the flowers are blooming and remind me of you
Mar. 21, 2014

I’m scared for the day when I can’t remember your face anymore or what your voice sounded like.

I’m absolutely terrified because that’s when you’ll truly be gone

Mar. 25, 2014

 

Thinking of Dani today.

 

Apr. 4, 2014

I’m starting to forget the way it sounded when you said my name and that terrifies me.

I am missing you

Apr. 28, 2014

You weigh heavy on my mind today. Maybe it’s because I was in Shane’s dream or something but I miss you

Jun. 8, 2014

I loved you. I loved you. I still love you. I miss you and forever will miss you.
Dammit Dani

Jun. 9, 2014

It’s already been six months since you died and it still feels like yesterday that I was curled into a ball screaming your name

Nov. 23, 2016

My brain feels crazy today. I’ve been buzzing. I cant seem to keep grounded.

Its all haunting me.

She’s haunting me, is it too soon to say that?

What is left in the dust covered urn?

Just that, dust I believe.

Its been three years since the phone call.

Board up my brain, don’t let them in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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